The best of the best from our time in 624, compiled here for your viewing.
Priceless advice, lots of fun, put the kettle on while you read them! ‘But I don’t like tea Tilly.’
Mrs Antrobus about Pudz- She’s nice but she hits people.
Priya- You can’t fit a horse in your house.
Gemma- Chuckle chuckle.
Lucy- Why would you do Zwingli? I mean, what on earth starts with Z? *ten minutes pass* You know what starts with Z? Zwingli!
Bex- Piglet and I aren’t on good terms at the moment, he used me for my beautiful breasts.
Manda- Leave my obesity alone.
Pudz and Priya- We’ve got to have you on our sausage sandwich.
Elle- My mathematics skills have really gone downhill, I added 5 and 6 and got 7.
Mrs Antrobus- Hayley, I’m sure the rest of the class would love to know that your cleavage is more interesting than what I’m saying!
Priya- I don’t think I’ve lost it but I don’t know where it is.
Manda- I think I just dropped a door on Priya.
Bex- Raisins are wrong, it’s like eating old people in fruit form.
Gemma- If you’re a figment of my imagination, why are you wearing clothes?
Elle- I’m not a twig, I’m the Messiah in skanky old lady form.
Mrs Ralphs- The Romans came, what did they leave?
Pudz- Life is a vagina.
Bex- It’s illegal to sell kittens.
Mrs Antrobus- I’ve been displaced by an aardvark.
Mrs Antrobus- What would you do if you were cut off from society, I mean you wouldn’t be able to watch Arthur
Hayley- I’d just have to reminisce about the episodes I’d already seen.
Manda- It was the funniest thing ever apart from like a fat woman falling over.
Manda- The poor buck-toothed people in Africa sadly can’t have braces.
Priya- She doesn’t even eat Yorkshire puddings, why would you trust her to pinky swear?
Priya- Every time you say the word twat I think about Sophie’s mom on the toilet.
Priya on her personal statement to do a primary-school teaching degree- Small children arouse me.
Priya- He can Gok me anytime.
Saleha analysing Princess Diana’s brother’s speech at her funeral- I think there’s the semantic field of Diana in this.
Pudz- I’m like Charlotte Church but brown.
Priya shouting from a cubicle- How do you get the toilet paper out?
Mrs Ralphs- When would you use the word sicko?
Priya: Get out my drawers sicko!
Mrs Ralphs- Pimp my ride yo.
Sophie K- I’m so scared I’ll become an alcoholic if I drink every day.
Manda- You’re giving her a nervous position.
Pudz- Buy me a kiss and I’ll drink you.
Priya- I got pubes stuck in my teeth and now I have veneers.
Helen- Can someone tell me if I went to the toilet before?
Rach- Oh April, please don’t stab anyone.
Mrs Antrobus- You know it’s serious when they come to school with a pritt-stick up their nose.
Priya- Do you know how to look after your monkey?
Mrs Gould- Let’s not go there Priya.
Beks- It’s stylish stripping, it’s not like ‘look at my thong’.
Priya- You should write a book: The diary of Anne Frank…by Harriet.
Manda- If you’re a big enough tit to shag a hedgehog, you deserve to have prickles up your arse.